Boston Survivor Samantha Daniels, 35, finishes college, owns home, has warm and loving husband, is “enjoying all that life has to offer”
My boyfriend’s arguments with me always started with words but ended with physical blows. When I was seventeen years old and a senior in high school, his blow to my face one afternoon in his apartment made me fall to my knees. I saw nothing but black. I felt warm blood running down my mouth. I regained my sight after a few seconds. I got up and ran to the bathroom. I discovered in the bathroom mirror that this individual who claimed to love me had broken my nose.
I asked him frantically to fix it, to break my nose back into place. He said he couldn’t. I left his apartment feeling shattered and defeated. I walked myself home. My mother and twelve year old sister opened the door and received me with my bloody face and busted up nose.
Even after this dangerous incident, I remained with this boyfriend for another two years. I never felt that I could do better for myself. I suffered from what I view today as extremely low self worth. His controlling behavior of verbal, emotional and physical abuse ruined my youth and my innocence. It took his moving away from my neighborhood for me to find the courage to end it. The saying “Out of sight, out of mind” really helped. Only then did I begin to recognize that I was worth so much more. I was also maturing. I began to surround myself with positive people who helped me to heal emotionally.
But I lived with the physical disfigurement well into my twenties. It was a constant reminder that my past was not far behind me. I would stand in front of my bathroom mirror for hours, examining my broken nose from every angle, dreaming of a regular nose. I couldn’t afford the surgery to correct it. But that changed.
I was given an opportunity to see Dr. John Lazor, a professional plastic surgeon and very kind man who is resident at The Massachusetts Eye and Ear Infirmary's Facial and Cosmetic Surgery Center. It was during this first consultation that I learned about The R.O.S.E Fund. I was worried that, when I met The R.O.S.E Fund advocates, they would reject me because the incident occurred way back in my adolescence. But I kept the mindset that I had nothing to lose. After meeting them and sharing my story, they made me understand that I wasn’t any less of a victim because years had passed; indeed I was someone who suffered significant trauma and abuse and who had been scarred for years. They were tremendously supportive and, much to my surprise accepted me as an eligible recipient.
I am grateful to all of the wonderful people who partnered with or donated their time and talents to The R.O.S.E. Fund. -- the surgeons and staff at the Mass Eye and Ear Infirmary, David Nicholas & Inc., Beauty and Mane, Lesley and Petal’s cooking / nutrition classes and many more.
The R.O.S.E Fund IS truly what it stands for, Regaining One’s Self Esteem. I say this because, after my corrective surgery and the healing, I felt positively different! I felt an enormous weight lift off my shoulders. I felt so relieved, so fortunate that I was given this opportunity. The greatest thing about going through all this is that someday, when I have my own children, I’ll be able to teach them about the warning signs of an unhealthy relationship. Then I will have broken the cycle of domestic violence for good. When my children are old enough, I will share with them the details of my unfortunate situation, but also the details of my FORTUNATE situation. There were good people to help me.
A lot of positive things have happened in my life since the surgery. I am happily married to a warm and loving man. I am a proud home owner. I have proudly completed my college degree. I have been enjoying all that life has to offer. Thank you R.O.S.E FUND, for renewing my Spirit!
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